Welcome back, my brothers! Since I’ve started teaching you about the universal truth and the law of cause and effect, I have constantly integrated my messaging methodology with more self-discovery while I have been pursuing a deeper understanding of the heart of nature and the essence of being human, which is why this episode is on the external authorities that have been trying to determine who you are since birth.

Today’s episode is a reminder that your alpha state is both as teacher and student. You utilize your defined true self to teach and your undefined true self to learn from others and receive from the world. We must recognize the rigid story external authorities have constructed that informs the story you tell about yourself, which causes separation between yourself and your true self. These external authorities attempt to define what success is and how to achieve it, but this can’t possibly be the same for everyone! Each of us are unique individuals who should be guided by our true, inner selves.

It is my belief that, if we were all to live according to our inner authority, there would be no need for the institutions that exist to be external guides, because we will be guided by our true alpha self. You need to uncover this guidance through self-knowledge and understanding who you are. Once you do that, you eliminate the need for external authorities telling you what to do. Tune in today in as I offer you the tools to help you unlock your inner authority and free yourself from external authorities!

Want to know more about what I do and how I can help you? Sign up for a free 45-minute session with me, and I’ll show you how this works!

What You’ll Learn From this Episode:

  • Our alpha state is as both teacher and student. 
  • External authorities are the cause of your separation from your true self.
  • Religion, politics, and education are global forms of conditioning.
  • Find your inner authority to free your true self.
  • You are unique and no external authority can instruct you on being who you truly are.
  • Putting together the unique puzzle pieces of who you are.

Listen to the Full Episode:

Featured on the Show:

  • Sign up for Unleash Your Alpha, your guide to shifting to the Alpha mindset.
  • Join us for questions and answers on the invite-only Clubhouse app.


[00:00:09] ANNOUNCER: Welcome to the Alpha Male Coach Podcast, the only podcast that teaches men the cognitive mastery and alpha mindset that it takes to become an influential and irresistible man of confidence. Here’s your host, certified life coach and international man of mystery, Kevin Aillaud. 


[00:00:32] KA: What’s up, my brothers? Welcome back to the Alpha Male Coach Podcast. I am your host, Kevin Aillaud. First off, I want to let you know. This podcast is probably going to be a little bit longer. I have an idea that it could go for a bit longer of amount of time than most of these episodes. But I also want to let you know before we get going that I’m offering a weekly question and answer on the podcast for everyone who is a member of the Clubhouse app. If you are not a member, you can go to the app store. You can download the Clubhouse. It’s something you need to be invited to. So if you can get on that, that would be amazing. 

I’m not confirming that this will last indefinitely. However, I am testing it out and I want to see how many of you have questions about the content that I offer on this podcast. I find that it’s a great medium to kind of do the question and answer through. For nearly three years, my friends, I have been teaching you about the universal truth and the law of cause and effect, and I’m constantly integrating my messaging methodology with more self-discovery. As you may have noticed, there has been a deeper understanding of the heart of nature and the essence of being human, what it means to be a human being. 

I know my message can be considered by some to be counterintuitive and in some ways even repelling. I know that sometimes the message that I send to you guys on this podcast can be very confronting. It can really kind of jar you or jolt you. I want to remind you that I am not here to make friends. I’m not here to get people to like me. I gave up people-pleasing long ago. I am here to offer you the truth, nothing more. While enrollment in the academy is at an all-time high and the certification program is filling up fast, I know there is still a lot of confusion and misinterpretation of the message that I deliver. 

If you are a member of the Clubhouse, you can find the weekly Q&A in the club called the Power in You. Now, this episode is on the external authorities that are not you. I was going to break it into a three-part series but I’m not going to do that. I decided against that because May in the academy is relationship month. It’s the secret to our relationships, and I want to get into relationships on the podcast. So I’m going to cover this very broad topic in one episode, which may make it a little longer than the typical episode you’re used to. 

Now, to begin, I am aware that what I say in this episode may be controversial. You may be confronted with a truth that you are not ready to hear, and I fully recognize that. I fully recognize that my message is received by most people in a very extreme way. You either love it or you hate it. People either think that I’m a genius or that I’m completely insane. No one that I know is lukewarm on the subject. They’re either like they’re very viscerally offended or they’re completely attracted and resonating with it. 

For the rest of this episode, brothers, I want to offer that you neither accept what I say nor reject it, that you neither love it nor hate it. But that you simply listen and listen with a deeper part of yourself than what is vibrating on your eardrums. Now, I’m going to begin by saying this. You are not who you think you are. Let me say that again. You are not who you think you are. Now, stay with me. I am not calling you a fraud. I am not saying that you need to be different. I am not saying that you are broken or damaged. I am not saying that there’s something wrong with you. I am not saying that you are imposter. I am not saying any of that. I’m simply saying that you are not who you think you are. 

Since the moment you were born, your mind has been seeking answers. That is what the mind does. It stores information. It teaches. It inspires. It dreams. It makes meaning of the world. All so that it can answer questions and solve problems. The first questions, there’s actually several. The first questions that the mind aimed to solve was what is this I am experiencing through my eyes. Who are these other beings? The big one, of course, is “who am I?”. This is in your infant state. When you first open your eyes and needed to make sense of the world, your parents, and yourself, these were the questions that started probing the mind. 

Now, for the sake of time, I’m going to leave the first two questions alone and I’m going to focus on the question the mind is constantly asking, who am I. There is a part of you that is you. This is your alpha state. This has been with you since you were born. It is a part of you that is the image and likeness of truth, your personal truth. Remember the puzzle of life? Do you remember that podcast, The Puzzle of Life? There is a cardboard puzzle that stretches out infinitely in all directions, and each puzzle piece is a human being. All the humans that exist have existed and will exist. Each puzzle piece has a unique shape and image. However, they are all made of cardboard. 

This is true of humans as well. We are all complete and the same in our humaneness. However, we’re all very different in who we are and what we do. So you have this image and likeness, and this is your alpha state, and you are born with this. Since your birth, your mind knows this. Your mind knows your alpha state. The moment you were born, your mind looked. It looked without eyes and it saw your alpha state and it said, “Okay, I see this being. I see this stability, this definition, this explained in very specific part of this being. There are no questions to answer here. There’s nothing for me to be curious about here.”

Then the mind looked again, and it’s some more of your alpha state. It’s some more of your true self. When it looked the second time, it said, “Okay, I see this being. It is open. It is undefined. I can learn something here. I can solve something here. I can be curious about this. I can make meaning from this.” From that point forward, the mind begins to ask the question, who am I, and it only collected data from the external world. You see, you have within you a truth. You are an alpha being that has an inner authority, a defined energy, what we could call a transmitter or a teacher. 

But you also have these areas that are a part of your true being, your true alpha state that are open to learning about the human experience, that take on the energy from the environment. This is a receiver. We could call this a receiver or a student. You are both a teacher and a student. Your alpha state is both a teacher and a student. You teach others and give to the world through your defined true self, and you learn from others and receive from the world through your undefined true self. 

Now, the mind doesn’t understand this. The mind does not know this. The mind wants to be in charge. The mind thinks that it’s running the show. It is not aware. This is the beta condition, brothers. Beta condition thinks it’s running the show. It is not aware that your true self is meant to be in charge and running the show. So the mind looks at your teacher transmitters and says, “Okay, I see this is defined. There’s no questions about this. All the answers are here,” and it turns away. Then it looks at your student receivers, and it says, “Okay, this is unknown. Let me ask a bunch of questions and fill these areas with answers.” This happens beginning at birth. It happens all through our childhood. Through our childhood our mind is constantly asking who am I and getting answers from these external authorities. Believe me, everyone wants to tell you who you think you should be. This is the beginning of our conditioning. Since you were a child, since I was a child, we’ve been being told who we should be. So much so that even simple unconscious systems have been programmed into our mind to make us believe it is who we are, even though it is not who we are. 

All along, you’ve always been who you are but your mind wasn’t satisfied with the defined parts of your true self. The mind wasn’t satisfied with the transmitters, with the teachers. It always wanted to receive the answers to self-imposed questions around the undefined, around the receiver student parts of your true self. The more questions it asked, the more conditioning you received. You grew up creating a story in your brain about who you are not because your mind is seeking answers to questions that aren’t you. The reason you have undefined parts of your true self is to live life through wisdom. To understand more about the nature of life, about being human, and about relating with other people. Receivers within us, the students within us are not meant to be filled with answers to the question who am I because the answer to that question is already answered. 

Now, if this concept is blowing your mind, right? If you’re listening to this podcast, you’re like, “Whoa, this is amazing. This is blowing my mind,” and just resonating in your body, I want you to know, brother, we haven’t even begun to scrape the surface of the truth. However, I want to move on. I want to move on so that I have time to introduce the content of the external authorities that have built the fixed rigid story you tell yourself about yourself that is the cause of the separation you have from your true self. So as I do this, I want to remind you and I want to emphasize that no two humans are meant to be the same ever. No two humans are ever the same. We are, by definition, unique and individual. Homogenization is a spiritual pandemic. 

Okay, so let’s start with some examples of external authorities. Now, some of these you are probably clearly aware of, while others may be jarring to hear, confronting even. It may be very confrontational to you. The two largest global and evident external authorities are religion and government. Now, before I go any further, I don’t know how many of you just switched off this podcast. But before I go any further, I have heard the claim that you never want to talk about religion and politics, right? Look. I know it’s not dinner conversation, and I understand that people get really emotional around their faith and their ideology, their political ideology. This is exactly why they are the most evident sources of global conditioning. It doesn’t matter what you believe. It doesn’t matter what you believe in terms of religion or politics. I’m not here to convince you of one thing or another. I’m not here to tell you this is right, this is wrong. That’s, in fact, the opposite of what I’m here to do. 

There is no right or wrong. I am here to offer that these are forms of external authorities that will lead you away from yourself and the truth of who you are, and I’m not saying that I’m an atheist or an anarchist. I’m not saying that I don’t have faith and that I don’t have ideology. Don’t let your mind judge what you’re hearing. Simply listen. I want you to understand. I want you to realize that you are a free human being. You are free, completely free to believe anything you want. You are free to do anything you want. You are free to construct any story that you choose. The earth is a playground for spiritual beings having a human experience.

Once you have adopted a particular story, whether it’s religious or political, and you move it in your mind from a story to a fact, you are forgetting the truth of who you are. If you know who you are, then no story ever becomes a fact. It remains a story in your mind. It can serve you if you choose it, and it never interferes with the lives of the others because it’s your story. It’s not their story. Your beliefs are yours. The moment you think your beliefs are meant for all people, you are in the illusion of conditioning. The global stories we tell are through religions and governments, and no one can ever tell you what to do.

Brother, I hear it all the time and I hear it even more often these days, right? You could probably imagine why. I hear people say, “I can’t do this,” or, “I can’t do that because the government doesn’t let me, because the government told me I have to do this, because the government told me I had to close my business or I had to stay at home. I can’t do it. I can’t do it. I can’t do it. I can’t do this or I can’t do that because it’s against my religion.” No one tells you what to do. You are following stories, my friend. These stories, when the mind mistakes them for authorities, become prisons of behavior that drive us to live out lives that are not our own. 

Another global external authority is the education program or the education system. Children are taught to go to school in a fixed, regimented schedule of do this, do that, learn this, and learn that. Follow the rules and you will succeed. Follow your own instincts and you will fail. Success and failure are further conditioned within us. You understand that even the concepts of failure and success are highly conditioned. What is success? What is our conditioning to believing success is? Is it lots of money? Is it job security? Is it a family, wife, and kids? Is marriage considered successful? Is divorce considered a failure? Is being single your whole life considered a failure? What is success? What is the conditioning that you have brought up to understand and believe? 

We have this education system that goes, that says to our children, “Go to school and learn. Go to school from this time to this time and learn this, this, and that.” Right? It’s so rigid. It’s so fixed. It’s so homogenized. It’s so standardized. Everyone is given the same testing, the same standard of what’s required to move to the next level. What is the next level? More conditioning. If you’re not jiving with the system, then what happens? Well, look. If we can’t condition you to be like everyone else, then there must be something wrong with you. You must have ADHD, or you must be bipolar or depressed or lazy or stupid, or you need more special attention, or you just need to get more stimulation, or you’re a problem. 

Or you know what? It’s your parents fault for not raising you right. It’s all garbage. It’s all just garbage because it’s trying to fit square pegs into round holes. It’s trying to say that all human beings need to be exactly the same. If you’re not, there’s something wrong with you. The education system is a form of external authority that conditions us to be what we are not by forcing us all to be the same. 

Now, very quickly, as a side note, and I will make this quick, I created the certification program for two reasons. To teach my methodology to people who want to coach other adults, either by working at the academy or starting their own coaching business. But I also created the coach certification program for parents who want to raise their children without conditioning. Every human is different, and every child needs to be raised according to who they are, not according to what we think they should be. I know that most parents want what’s best for their kids. I am an uncle, and I see my brother dote over his daughter, dote over my niece. I also see him teaching her to be like him, to be what he thinks she should be. He does it out of love. He does it out of this idea that he wants what’s best for her. 

Brothers, children need to be seen, understood, and loved. Until we know who we are, we will always be raising the next generation through a hypnosis of who we are not, layers of conditioning over conditioning. So the education system is a form of external authority that conditions us; religions, governments, and education systems. These are global forms of conditioning. 

Now, before I go on, I also want to mention that none of these things are good or bad, right? They exist in the realm of form. They exist in the realm of data, density, matter. They are neutral. They are simply there to condition us. Their aim, their goal is to condition us by creating a program of instruction that we fall into in a zombie -like pattern, and then we follow it for the rest of our lives. When we start the process of deconditioning, sometimes our beliefs change, and sometimes they don’t. There’s nothing right or wrong about anything we currently believe. It’s just that it’s a story. It’s not the content of the belief that makes it a conditioning. It is the lack of awareness that it is not who we are. That is only a story that we are choosing to follow as long as it serves our inner authority and truth. 

In my personal and humble opinion, when we are all living according to our inner authority, there will be no need for these things because we have no need for external guidance. We will be guided by who we are. We’ll be guided by our alpha self. The only guidance that is required is not behavioral guidance. It is not to give advice as to what to do. The guidance that’s required is into self-knowledge. It is to discover who you are. When you do that, you will know what to do and you will not need external authorities to tell you what to do. The current service that these external authorities provide is a path for those who do not listen to their internal authority because they allow the mind to be the authority, which is the not self-conditioning. From that not self-conditioning, there is suffering. To relieve themselves from that suffering, they turn to the external authorities. You see the cycle. You see the circle. Instead, I offer that you find your inner authority, and this will set you free. 

Now, what about the external authorities that are closer to us? There are the communities the clubs, the groups, the friends, the coaches, the parents, the families. Whenever we attach our mind to a belief or an idea that is from someone else’s life, we are living in this condition state. We are not living as our true self. Remember, every human being is different. Every single human on the planet is different and will live differently. There is no one right way. There is no one right thing. 

Here’s an example. I’ve heard this before. Tell me if you’ve heard this before. Again, you can’t really tell me because it’s the podcast, but I want to know. Have you heard this before? If you want to be successful, you need to wake up at 4:30 AM. Have you heard this before? Now, it doesn’t matter what time zone you’re in, right? Because it’s in books, right? It’s in books. It’s on social media. It’s all over the place. If you want to be successful, you need to work while other people are sleeping. Skip the party, work hard, sacrifice now to achieve later. Have you heard this? Do you agree with it? That’s a better question. Because the have you heard it is binary. It’s yes or no. But do you agree with it? Yes or no? Would you say it’s a fact? Yes or no? Would you say that this is the path to success? Would you say that those who follow this path will be successful? Would you say that those who don’t follow this path will never be successful?

Now, look. It’s okay if you believe it. I’m not here to judge you and I’m not here to tell you what’s right or wrong. I know there are a lot of coaches who tell their students this. I know there are a lot of IG feeds, Instagram feeds that promote this. I know there are entire books that are written about this. You know what? There’s a lot of money being made by repeating this. In fact, what is even more fascinating to me is what is said about and believed about the opposite. That if you sleep past 7:00 AM in the morning that you’re lazy. That if you work 20 hours a week, you’re lazy or you’re not applying yourself enough. If you party on the weekend, then you’re wasting your life. You’re wasting your time. You’re wasting your money. 

The crux of it all is that if you are successful, and again we’re back to whatever successful means, but the crux of it is if you are successful when you do these things, when you sleep past 7:00 AM, when you work 20 hours a week, when you enjoy yourself on the weekend, you hang out with your friends and party on the weekend, then the message is, well, if you didn’t do those things, if you did get up at 4:30, if you did work more hours, if you didn’t go out and party, then you’d be even more successful. It’s almost like you can’t win because if you’re finding success working 20 hours and you’d be more successful working 40. If you’re finding success sleeping till 7:00 AM, then you’d be more successful getting up at 4:30. Right? It’s like, “Come on. What does that mean? What’s the message here?” The message is that everybody needs to be the same. 

This is where I’m going to wrap things up a bit because listen, brothers. There’s a difference between guiding and dictating. There’s a huge difference between what I do and what I hear so many other coaches do. I don’t tell people how to live their lives. I don’t tell my students what to do. I just help them find the life they’re meant to live. I never tell my students what to do. If someone tells you that you have to wake up at 4:30 AM and follow a routine of XYZ and go to the gym and work 60 hours a week and grind, grind, grind. If you want to live the life of your dreams, then let me be the first to tell you that, number one, not only is that not true. It actually may leave you burnt out and frustrated. If someone tells you that you’re lazy, and you force yourself to do, do, do, work, work, work, and live a life of having someone else’s words as a whip against your back, you will suffer. 

This is the conditioning we receive as children, and it continues into adulthood. Consider it. Think about it. Think about your childhood. We went to school from 8:00 to 2:00, right? Maybe it was slightly different. I don’t know but 8:00 AM to 2:00 PM. Then when we grow up, we get to go to work from 9:00 AM to 5:00 PM. Do you see it? Do you see how we are conditioned to live the life of an employee? Do you see how we are conditioned to believe we need to trade our time for money? Don’t even get me started on money. That is a whole different podcast episode, brothers. I could go deep with you into money. The way that humans think about money, it’s backwards and it creates so much unnecessary suffering. 

So, what’s next, right? I mean, we’ve been all over the place on this episode. I’ve been all over the place on this episode, and I figured what happened because, look, my business has exploded. I have so many students in the academy and so many students living into their true selves that the universe continues to offer me more students. As more and more students come to the academy and the certification course seeking answers, they are finding within themselves that moment when the momentous leap occurs, and the entire world seems to just blow up. It seems to just change color. It seems to take on an entirely different feeling, an entirely different experience. It all begins with deconditioning. You cannot know yourself as long as you continue to believe that you are someone you are not. As long as you continue to live a life that somebody else has told you is best for you.

We are all taught, brother, all of us from childhood to believe that we are someone we are not. It is a part of being a human because we all have parts of our true self, parts of our alpha state that is a receiver of the world. These receivers are for us. It is a part of why we’re here on this playground called earth. The problem occurs is that when we take on the identity of the not self-conditioning, instead of using our alpha wisdom to recognize that we are receiving information from the world about the world. Not information from the world about who we are. 

Deconditioning begins with awareness, and it proceeds with guidance. Do not live in isolation and try to go out and do it on your own. Find a guide. Seek out someone who can help you see more of who you are. Seek out someone who can help show you the truth of who you are. When you seek a guide, make sure that they never tell you what to do. They may provide some exercises of self-study. This is part of what we do. This is part of what I do. I do offer that you’ll do some thought downloads. Look at the model of alignment. There are things that I offer my students to do because it helps that decondition process. It helps flush out the stories. However, no one knows what is best for you. No one can tell you how you should live your life. 

I have guided students who have busted their butts, put out so much effort working 60 hours a week because some book told them that that was the path to success, and their businesses barely got off the ground. After working with them and helping them see who they are, how they best fit in the worlds, help show them their true image and likeness, their position in the puzzle, they worked less and felt more freedom and had more success. I’ve worked with students who’ve approached hundreds, maybe thousands of women and rarely got their phone numbers because they were going about it the wrong way. After working together and guiding them into themselves, they understood that they could go anywhere at any time, and women will come to them because now they understand their truth, their personal truth. It is never about the time. It is never about the effort. It is always about being who you are. 

Now, brothers, I want to close with saying this last thing. This podcast will be under 30 minutes, right? I promise you. We’re going to get done here. I want to close by saying this. You are unique. If you take nothing else from this podcast, take this. You are unique. There was only one of you. There is only you. There is no one else like you. There cannot be anyone else like you. You have a unique shape and image that fits into this puzzle of life. The more you try to be someone else, the more you pick up a book and says, “This is what I must do,” or the more you look at someone you admire and say, “That’s what I should be,” the more you move away from who you truly are. 

There is no one like you, and no one knows how to live your life except for you. Your mind is full of stories that you are not because you’ve listened to people tell you about themselves, and your mind says, “If it worked for them, it’ll work for me.” Or it says, “If I want to be like them, then I need to do what they did, or I need to do what they tell me to do.” That’s garbage, brother. That’s a prevarication. If you want to understand, like really understand success, you have to understand yourself. If you want to live your life, you must discover yourself. If you want to be free of suffering, you must be free of conditioning. You are you. I’ll see you next week, my friend. Elevate your alpha.


[00:27:53] ANNOUNCER: Thank you for listening to this episode of The Alpha Male Coach Podcast. If you have enjoyed what you’ve heard and want even more, sign up for Unleash Your Alpha, your guide to shifting to the alpha mindset at thealphamalecoach.com/unleash.