Ep#129: The Story You Tell Yourself

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It is good to be back brothers, and it is even better that I have you with me on this incredible journey. Let’s cut to the chase: the matrix has you. Yes, the Matrix has you. This episode marks the end of our relationship theme, but let it be said: we cannot be in life without being in relation to something or someone, and that includes the Matrix.

Where am I getting at with all this? We need to first understand what that Matrix is, which is the story you tell yourself about yourself. Friends, everything begins with an individual or collective story, and from there you find the evidence to support your story with a psychological term called confirmation bias. 

The important work that I do is to teach my students how to write their own story, and to escape conditioning where others are writing your story for you. In this episode, I talk about how this happens, and more specifically, how you can take your power back. Just remember, it’s the story that holds everything together, and it’s that same story that manifests our effect.

Brothers, only you know who you are in expression of form; not me. But listen up. I’m here to tell you that you’re a creator; the most powerful organic being on this planet. Fish breathe underwater, birds fly in the sky, and you my friend, create the world we know as reality. So when you are creating your story, your reality, and you want to change its course, you have to start with a different input to get a different output.

So I’m offering you a process that is split into four parts. Number one: bringing consciousness to unconsciousness. Number two: separate the story from the facts. Number three, ask: does the story serve me? Step five: change the story. Brothers, walk beside me as we follow the steps to write the story we each deserve. 

Want to know more about what I do and how I can help you? Sign up for a free 45-minute session with me, and I’ll show you how this works!

What You’ll Learn From this Episode:

  • Let’s get into what the Matrix is and how it affects each and every one of us.
  • I talk about how so many of our brothers are sitting in the passenger seat of their lives, and how they can get back behind the wheel.
  • Why “the story” is what holds everything together, and how it manifests our effect.
  • I’m not here to write your story for you, I’m just here to tell you that you can write your story.

Listen to the Full Episode:

Featured on the Show:

• Check out the Indomitable Self-Confidence Course. 

• Remember to sign up for the new How to Live Your Purpose course.

• Get free from your undesirable habits in the How to Stop Buffering Course.

• Sign up for Unleash Your Alpha, your guide to shifting to the Alpha mindset.

[INTRODUCTION]

[00:00:09] ANNOUNCER: Welcome to The Alpha Male Coach Podcast, the only podcast that teaches men the cognitive mastery and alpha mindset that it takes to become an influential and irresistible man of confidence. Here’s your host, certified life coach and international man of mystery, Kevin Aillaud.

[EPISODE]

[00:00:32] KA: What’s up, my brothers? Welcome back to The Alpha Male Coach Podcast. I am your host, Kevin Aillaud, and the Matrix has you. Yes, the Matrix has you. I am beginning this podcast with an end to the relationship’s theme. Although in truth, everything is a relationship. We cannot be in life without being in relation to something or someone, even if that someone is ourselves and we are always in relationship with the Matrix.

What is the Matrix? The Matrix is a story we tell ourselves about ourselves and the world. There is nothing around you that is not a story you tell yourself about yourself. Everything my friend begins with an individual or collective story. And from there, you find the evidence to support your story with a psychological term called confirmation bias, which is a concept that I will devote an entire podcast episode to in the coming weeks.

But The Matrix is a movie, you guys know it’s a movie. But here’s what’s not a movie, here is the truth. Life is a story. It is all the distractions of the mind that you chose to believe and have forgotten that you chose it, which has now become for you an illusion of reality. There is a reality behind the story that you don’t see. Humans are just beginning to evolve into seeing the real and are becoming aware of the story. However, since the story is so powerful, instead of seeing the reality, humans are making up new stories to cover the old stories. This is a process of shifting paradigms.

What I teach my students is how to write their own story. There is too much conditioning, my friends. There’s too much of other people writing the story for us for you. There is the media, there is the educational system, there is the passing on of information from previous generations. There are the opinions of the friends of the partners and of the neighbors. There are all the religions of the world. And of course, there is the environment, society in general. And as an alpha brother once said, “It is no measure of health to be well adapted to a profoundly sick society.”

When the human species reaches a level of growth and fails to adapt to its growth, here is a state of mass confusion and global division. The master himself said, “I have come to bring division, father against son, and son against father. How can you interpret the weather and not see what is happening in your own time in this moment?” And this is as true today, as it was in the master’s time because there is only one time. We are here, now, always at the precipice of change and blind to see the world as it is. We do not see the cause or the law, we only see the effect and we hold on to this effect as an illusion of reality, a fantasy of permanency. The cause is the story we tell ourselves about ourselves and the law is the transition of story to form through time.

For most people, the story is unconscious and the law is unknown, and so on and on it goes. Trading effect for effect, result for result. Always looking outward for answers when all along the answer is within you. This is the source of confusion and conflict. Now, brothers, everything around you is the result of a story we tell ourselves. Our global result is a collective story. Our individual lives are a personal story. The measurement of time and distance, money and civilization, these are all collective stories. These are not real. A year or a day are stories based on the movement of planetary bodies. We don’t have a year. A year is just the movement of the Earth around the sun. A day is just the movement of the Earth spinning on its axis.

Now, due to the slowing of the rotation of the Earth, seconds are based around the radiation at the ground state of the cesium-133 atom. And these are stories that we all agree to because of our conditioning. We agree to the story about a second. We look at our watches and we watch seconds. We wake up in the morning and we calculate a day, but very few humans know the reason for a day. They know the reason for a year or even fewer still understand the way a second is truly measured. We only know the story. Money is a story.

Imagine an intelligent nonhuman arriving from a distant planet. Okay, use the term alien, if you want, use the term Martian if you want, it doesn’t really matter. Imagine a non-human intelligent being, and they ask us about our trading system. They say, “How do you trade for goods and services?” And we tell them about money. And we show them our currency. We show them our coin, our paper, and our plastic. Wouldn’t they assume, based on our story, that they could take a Post-it note, write 100 on it, and use it to trade for $100 worth of goods and services? What makes a fake, a fake? What makes a counterfeit bill, a counterfeit bill? The story, my friends. The story is the only thing that holds it together. The story is what manifests our effect. The story is what the results we call reality are created.

Now, I want you to understand this. I really want you to know this and, and I’ve done so many podcasts teachings on this because I want you to know how much power you have. I want you to know how much power you have as a human being. Most of our species abdicates our power away to other humans and to limited stories. When you understand this at a visceral level, far beyond the logical or intellectual level that so many of you already have grasp. Your life will take a momentous leap into a place where 100% control, power, and responsibility rests upon you. There is no such thing as a government. There is only a collective story that we call a government. The laws, the mandates, the lockdowns, the ideologies, these are all stories. When you accept them as facts, you become their slave. When you understand them to be stories, you liberate yourself from their control.

Furthermore, and more importantly, there is an individual story you have running in your brain about who you are, about what you’re capable of, and about where you fit in the world. You have built a prison in your mind for yourself and forgot that you’ve locked yourself into it. Like a monkey who lives in the jungle, you know nothing of the sea. Like a whale in the ocean, you know nothing of the sky. Your world is limited through the story you tell yourself, about yourself, and that story has been conditioned in you since you were born. Genetics determine form and nothing more. There is no gene for attraction. You are not attracted to brunettes because of genetics, my friend. You are not born that way. You chose that unconsciously and have lived within that story for so long, that you think it’s just the way you are, that you just have this gene in you, that makes you attracted to dark haired women.

It’s like living in Neverland. You haven’t grown outside of the story you’re conditioned to as a child and now you hold on to this story and turn it into your personal truth as an adult. The crime in this, is that there are adults who are telling you to this day, how to write your story and you believe them. Humans continue to shift from one story to another, thinking that they’re growing, thinking that they’re developing, while all the while they’re moving laterally through time, never evolving, never growing into who and what they truly are.

And who are you? What is the answer to that? That is not for me to say, specifically. I cannot say specifically who you are. I teach students how to write their own stories. I do not tell students what stories to write. I do not know what the life of your dreams is. I only hope you live the life that you dream. Only you know who you are in expression or form. But I will tell you this: you are a creator. You are the most powerful organic being on this planet. Fish can breathe underwater, birds can fly in the sky, but you my friend, you create the world we know as reality from your power of creation, from your mind, from your thoughts from your story.

Now let’s move away from the global story. This podcast is far too short and far too simple to go down that rabbit hole. I have done that with my students. If you want to understand more of that, then you can buy my book when it comes out. I am writing a book on this topic. But for now, for this episode, let’s stay with you. You as an individual. You are the story you tell yourself about yourself. The world is not what you see. It’s a blank form. It’s waiting to be turned into what you imagined it to be, your life, your future is a blank form, waiting to be turned into what you imagined it to be. If you do not learn this skill and apply it in your life, you will continue to create more of what you’ve already created, because you will continue to live from the unconscious story you are telling yourself right now. Same story, same results. New story, new results.

There are students who come to the academy and they say to me, “I don’t know how to make more money. Tell me how to make more money.” And I say to them, “Change your story.” There are students who come to me in the academy and say, “I don’t know how to get over my relationship. I don’t know how to deal with loss. Tell me coach, how do I learn to move on?” And I say to them, “Change your story.” There are students who come to me because they want to stop buffering. They enroll in the academy, because they want to stop overeating. They want to stop doing drugs, they want to stop watching pornography, they want to stop drinking alcohol, they say, “Tell me how. How do I do this?” And I say, “Change your story.” We don’t change our effects by changing our effects. The effects will always perpetuate the effects. This is confirmation bias. If you want to change your effects, you have to change the cause. If you want a different output, you have to start with a different input. When you run a scientific experiment, you don’t change the results of the experiment by focusing on the results. You analyze the results and adjust the cause.

Humans are so caught up in doing this is an effect. Humans say, “They tell me what to do.” And I say, “No, my brother. I’m not going to tell you what to do. I will help you understand who you want to be. There is no amount of doing that will change your result.” This is the forcing of willpower, a finite source that we tap into as alphas in order to create evidence to support the change in our story. However, we have to change the story first. If the story hasn’t been changed first, then all acts of willpower are futile and limited. And when they run out, behaviors will resort back to the story that you’ve always known, that you’ve always told yourself. This is called self-sabotage. This is called relapse.

An alpha brother has told us, all the world’s a stage, and all the men and women are merely players. They have their exits and their entrances and one man in his time plays many parts. His acts being seven ages. William Shakespeare had his own beliefs on the oscillation of the human experience, which he alluded to in seven ages. But the point is, is that he knew of the Matrix, he knew we were living in a story, a play, a movie. The question I have for you is this. Are you an extra in someone else’s story? A movie that someone else has written, someone else’s directing, and someone else is starring? Or are you the writer, director and star of your own movie? The former is the beta living in the beta condition. The ladder is the alpha and what I teach my students in the academy. Nothing is wrong with either. Good and bad are subjective to the thinker and I am not the judge. The question is only for you my friend, does it serve you? Are you living the life of your dreams?

As my teacher Tony Robbins says, “Are you doing what you want, when you want, where you want, with who you want, as much as you want?” And if you say no, then you are not living the life that you are meant to be living. You are not writing your own story, period. So, what do you do? What do you do? You enroll in the academy, brother, or sign up for a consultation call.

Look, my friends, I am not selling a service, I am guaranteeing you a result. I am offering you food because you are starving. You are eating plastic and I am telling you that I have something that tastes better and will nourish your body. There is no greater thing than self-discovery. And I guarantee that after one year in the academy, your life will be what you determine it to be. Unfortunately, I can’t simply tell you this. I can’t just say this on this podcast and you believe it to be true. I have to show it to you through coaching and you have to experience it yourself through time, through living it. And many of you are not ready. And that’s your journey. That’s okay.

When you are ready to take control of your life, you will know and you will enroll, and I love you all so much. It is in my compassion. It is because of my compassion for you that I know how much you suffer needlessly. And it’s through unconditional love for you, for all of you that I have never met personally but that I know are out there listening. I know that you are living a perfect life as you are meant to. And when the time is right, you will come and learn how to elevate your alpha, personal alpha, and individual alpha to you, and you will live the life you choose with intention and with purpose.

Until that time, I want to offer you this process. It is in four parts. First, become aware of your thinking. I know this sounds simple, it sounds too simple, but it’s not. The brain is an efficient result creating machine and, in its effort, to be so efficient, it creates an automated process we call unconsciousness. In your unconsciousness, you forget your choices, you forget your power and you forget yourself. You live in a world of false facts. You live in a world of illusions that you think are real. And to become aware of your thinking, the most effective way is to write your thoughts down on paper. Yes. We are going old school on this. Get a notebook, brother, buy a pen. Every single day, write down all of your thinking. Have a mental enema on the parchment, let it out. Don’t stop writing. If you can, write around a specific event that occurred in your life so that you can see all of the thoughts you have about it. Do this, especially if that event is particularly troubling to you. And write, just write, and then write some more. Fill the page. Right for 10 minutes. If your brain says, “Don’t write that, it’s stupid”, or “I don’t want to think that”, then write it down. This is what you must see. You must see what your brain is afraid for you to know. This is the unconsciousness. That is the story you tell yourself about the world and about yourself.

Now, I call this a thought download, and it is highly effective for bringing consciousness to unconsciousness for bringing awareness to the unaware. That’s number one. Number two, separate the story from the facts. And this is more difficult, and it generally requires coaching. I will be totally upfront and candid with you guys here. This requires coaching. You don’t have to have coaching, you can develop this skill on your own. However, it may take years for what you can accomplish in weeks with a coach. The reason is, because when you are on the inside of your story, you can’t see the story. When your entire life has been living within the walls of a compound, you have no idea that a world exists outside the compound. It’s like The Truman Show. If you ever seen that show with Jim Carrey, right? You don’t know anything about the bubble, outside this bubble, of the story that you live within. To emancipate yourself from the bubble, like Truman did, takes the help of other people. It takes coaching. Otherwise, you may end up living your entire life in this bubble, in this story.

Once you see the bubble and escape from it, you have the skills to do it again and again and again all on your own. This is why I guarantee this as a result. My students are not dependents, they eventually become masters themselves. However, you have to see the Matrix first. You have to be trained. You have to learn the skill first. This is the momentous leap and this is 70% of the training.

The third step is a simple binary question. And it’s thi: does the story serve you? If the answer is yes, then keep it and it is no longer an unconscious conditioning. It is now a deliberate choice. Do you like the taste of broccoli? Yes or no? Understand my friend, broccoli doesn’t taste good or bad, it just tastes like broccoli. You’ve been conditioned to like it or to not like it. And now, you believe that you were born with this. You were either born liking the taste of broccoli or not liking the taste of broccoli. But that’s your conditioning. No human being on this planet was born liking or disliking any food. It’s always a choice. And I’m not saying you should or shouldn’t like broccoli, I’m saying you learn to make the choice yourself and determine what’s best for you instead of living in the condition story. There is a huge difference. Remember, there’s a huge difference between living as an extra in a movie that you didn’t write and you don’t direct, versus living as a star in a movie that you’ve written and you’re directing. That’s where part three takes you.

Now, if you answered no, to part three, then we go into changing the story. This is part four. This is another step that really is most effective and most efficient with coaching. Writing a new story can take years when you do it alone. I know this because I’ve done it myself several times by myself. Changing your identity, brothers, is the hardest thing anyone can ever do. And I want to offer that with a coach you can expedite that process to serve you. You can make get it done at a faster rate. The move here is to let go of the old story and begin to accept and believe the new story while taking massive action and finding evidence to support the new story. This is also a skill that you train. And because it’s requires training, it requires effort, and it requires practice. It requires physiology, requires physical movement, and it requires practice. It requires a change in your neurology.

So, very quickly, to review, there are four parts to changing your results and living the life of your dreams. Number one, become aware of the story you tell yourself right now. That’s the thought download. You can do this on your own, but make sure you write it down. Don’t sit there and think about your thoughts. If you sit there and think about your thoughts, you’re not getting the job done. You’ve got to write them down. You’ve got to see what it is your brain is telling you. Number one, become aware of the story you tell yourself about yourself.

Number two, separate the story from the reality. Break away the beliefs from the facts, and this is much faster and more effective with coaching. Right now, you think your subjectivity is objective. To see your subjectivity as subjective, you will want a coach who can reflect your subjectivity back to you in separation from what is truly objective. That’s number two, separate the story from the reality.

Number three, ask yourself the question, does this story serve me? Do I want these results? Am I living my purpose? Am I living my best life?

Number four, if you answered yes, then choose to keep the story on purpose. Just reaffirm the story, make it deliberate, make it purposeful, make it intentional. But if you answered no, then we begin the process of rewriting your story. And this is also more effective and more efficient with coaching, because this is where cognitive dissonance, massive action, confirmation bias, and mental rehearsal all come into play and you will develop the skills required to repeat this process on your own throughout the rest of your life.

That’s what I got for you today, brothers. I am so excited for the future and working with those of you that are ready to become captains of your ship, masters of your mind, creators of your future. For me, this is a labor of love. This is my purpose, to teach to you what you can teach to others, what you can teach to your children, and they can teach to their children. We are one. The skills I learn are the skills I teach. The life I intend for myself is the skill I offer you so that you can intend the life you choose. No more. Will the human being be a slave to the mind, will be a slave to the story, will be a slave to each other, or be a slave to society? Because we are alphas living in a beta society and now is the time for you to live, to do what you want, when you want, where you want, with who you want, and as much as you want. Now is the time to master your health, your wealth and your relationships. Now is the time for you to elevate your alpha.

[END OF EPISODE]

[00:21:52] ANNOUNCER: Thank you for listening to this episode of the Alpha Male Coach Podcast. If you enjoyed what you’ve heard and want even more, sign up for Unleash your Alpha: Your guide to shifting to the alpha mindset, at the alphamalecoach.com/unleash.

[END]

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