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Welcome back to The Alpha Male Coach Podcast, my brothers! Over the next few weeks, I will be living off the grid in the Amazon rainforest, which is why I’ve put together this series of conversations with some of my Spartan Academy and certification course students so that they can share their firsthand experiences with you.
Today, you’ll hear from Jay Chekansky, who has been doing amazing work in the Academy for over a year now. He shares a bit about his story with us, from why he ended up joining the Academy to how it helped him break free from what was expected of him and overcome his previous money scarcity mindset. We discuss the generational healing that Jay has facilitated by refusing to accept his conditioning, how he learned to have faith in himself, and why ‘doing the work’ was a critical component of elevating his alpha.
Jay speaks candidly about the biggest challenge he had to overcome during his 15 months at the Academy, how he was able to step into being the kind of man he wanted to be, and what his Impossible Goal for 2021 taught him about the power of abundance. He also shares his advice for you, my brothers, before you enroll in the Elevated Alpha Society Spartan Academy and emphasizes the importance of being honest with yourself about your goals.
To find out how Jay discovered more money, more time, and more self-actualization (and how you can do the same), make sure not to miss today’s insightful conversation!
Want to know more about what I do and how I can help you? Sign up for a free 45-minute session with me, and I’ll show you how this works!
What You’ll Learn from This Episode:
- How Jay joined the Academy to break the mold society expected him to fit into.
- Why he considers his faith in himself to be the most valuable asset he has acquired.
- What his journey has been like and why ‘doing the work’ was crucial for his success.
- How Jay was able to step into being the man he wants to be thanks to one-on-one coaching.
- His Impossible Goal for 2021 and how it helped him recognize the power of abundance.
- The importance of being honest about your goals before you enroll in the Academy.
- Jay’s favorite movie, the greatest challenge he has overcome, how to contact him, and more!
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
- Connect with Jay on LinkedIn or send him an email.
- Remember to check out the new How to Live Your Purpose course.
- Enroll for the Elevated Alpha Society Spartan Academy here.
- Learn how you can enter to win one of five FREE coaching sessions here!
- Sign up for Unleash Your Alpha, your guide to shifting to the Alpha mindset.
- Grab your free copy of my new book, The Universal Truth, here!
[INTRODUCTION]
[00:00:09] ANNOUNCER: Welcome to The Alpha Male Coach Podcast, the only podcast that teaches men the cognitive mastery and alpha mindset that it takes to become an influential and irresistible man of confidence. Here’s your host, certified life coach and international man of mystery, Kevin Aillaud.
[EPISODE]
[00:00:32] KA: What’s up, my brothers? Welcome back to The Alpha Male Coach Podcast. I am your host, Kevin Aillaud. Over the next few weeks, I am living, literally living in the Amazon rainforest, brothers. I’m living in the jungle right next to the Amazon River, and I decided to set up a series of interviews with a small selection of academy and certification course students, so they could tell you a little bit about their experiences. I’ll be back in February. Until then, remember to pick up a free copy of my book, The Universal Truth, and you can do that at thealphamalecoach.com/freebook. Now, enjoy meeting these brothers and elevate your alpha.
What’s up, brothers? Welcome back to The Alpha Male Coach podcast. I’ve got another brother from the academy here who has been in the academy for over a year. Over a year, Jay’s been in the academy, doing amazing things, and I wanted him to come in and kind of tell his story. So guys, this is Jay Chekansky. I would say not just a student but a friend as well. I want to throw it to him, so he can introduce himself, and he can just basically tell you a little bit about his story, what brought him to the academy, and where he’s been.
[00:01:53] JC: Thanks, Kevin. I’m honored and very happy to be here, speaking with you and everything today. So Jay Chekansky, 40 years old. I live in Charlotte, North Carolina and part of the academy for 15 months now. It has been an incredible journey, working with you and working with the group and doing the work every day. So I’m a full-time real estate professional. I buy and sell houses, properties, portfolios, flip houses, rentals, seller finance, all that fun stuff, but I started my professional career as a mechanical engineer back in 2004. I guess long story short, how I ended up in the academy was I spent the better part of eight or nine years of my life contorting myself to fit into this societal box, so go to school, get a job, sit in a cubicle till you’re 65, save for retirement, yada, yada. I swim against the current for a number of years, like I said, trying to make myself fit into that mold. But deep down, I knew I was destined for, and I knew I had skills and power and determination to do much greater things.
I was struggling to unlock that stuff and running into some issues and almost like seeking permission to be who I am. I stumbled on the podcast and binge-listened to that for a week or two. I found that I really connected with your message and how you delivered it. I love the mechanical nature of the model and how that simplifies such complex things in our lives, and decided it was time to reach out to you and make that phone call, the consulting phone call. Signing up was a pretty easy decision.
[00:03:38] KA: Awesome, brother. So many amazing things in there like societal mold. If I can use the word pandemic, that’s really the pandemic that we’re all dealing with is societal mold, is the homogenization of the species. So you seeking something outside of that, first of all, knowing that there is something outside of that is very intuitive and then going and seeking that. Also mentioned seeking permission, that’s another big thing that a lot of students deal with is that permission seeking, looking for external validation, looking for others to kind of give them approval for who they can be or should be or have the potential to be, and getting rid of all that, knowing that you are the one that determines your life for yourself, that you are the only person that needs permission from you. Even that, it’s permission. You have permission to do anything you want.
I love – By the way, brothers, when Jay says the mechanics of the model, for those of you guys who may be new to the podcast, he’s talking about the model of alignment. He’s talking about the way we look at the universal truth, that framework for the universal truth. Circumstances trigger thoughts. Thoughts create emotions. They create the feelings. Feelings drive actions. Then actions will determine our results. But our results are just a reinforcement of that thought. It’s just a confirmation bias that we’re thinking, and that’s the model of alignment that Jay is talking about. So if you guys have questions on that, go ahead and go back and listen to some of the earlier podcasts because, as he says, like that’s the 101. That’s the beginning, right? That’s the word that he’s talking about. So I love it.
Thank you for telling us about your story too, brother, because I’m going to get back into real estate. I’m going to ask you more questions on real estate and just having to do with your 2021 impossible goal. But because you said 15 months ago, 15 months ago, some things happened. If you don’t mind getting too personal, brother, what was going on 15 months ago? Like what was happening at that time that – I guess you said you found the podcast. Why were you seeking podcasts? What were you seeking there when you found the podcasts? What was going on in your life?
[00:05:38] JC: Well, not just seeking the podcast. But as part of this journey, when I shifted from trying to fit myself into that society or mold into, let’s say, stepping into who I am, along the way I was looking at self-improvement, male confidence, just stepping into being a man and doing so unapologetically, and I stumbled on The Alpha Male Coach podcast. In my life, what was going on in real estate, running my own business since 2015, and through to some other circumstances, I ended up going back to work on a W2 job, doing real estate on one of my real estate business on the side at night.
In May of 2020, I stepped away from that W2 job and back on my own and was experiencing some money scarcity issues. It’s been something that has been a big part of my life that I knew I needed to overcome. It was a big part of the way I was brought up. The reasons for that are the people in my family lived through different things. So my grandparents lived through the Great Depression in the ‘30s and stuff like that. So their view of money got imprinted in me at a young age. I had the slow drip of a good W2 income for a long time. Then when you take that away, a big magnifying glass gets shined on the program you’ve got running in the background. At the time, it was money scarcity, and that was a – Listening to your podcast on money were a big reason why I scheduled the call and ultimately joined the academy.
[00:07:13] KA: Yeah. I love it, brother, money scarcity. It wasn’t just you, right? It wasn’t just you. It was your parents, your grandparents. I mean, you mentioned the Great Depression, so all of that.
[00:07:23] JC: Society, my employer. I mean, every year, when it came time for a raise, there was only so much in the budget for everyone, and it had to be divvied up at two or three or four or five percent or whatever the number was.
[00:07:37] KA: Oh, yeah.
[00:07:38] JC: I mean, it’s all aligned.
[00:07:39] KA: Scarcity. Yeah.
[00:07:40] JC: Yeah. When I stepped away from that world and start observing the people around me in the real estate investing world, these people truly live an abundant lifestyle, and it was crazy to be exposed to that.
[00:07:56] KA: Again, coming back to the model of alignment, that’s exactly what we’re talking about. Your results reinforce your thoughts. So if your thoughts are the money scarcity, that’s the results that you’re living, and you can see that there’s an abundance out there. But if there’s not a change in your beliefs, if there’s not a change in your thoughts, then those results just seem impossible. They seem like, although that’s somebody else’s life, they must be lucky. They must have had some opportunities that you didn’t have. Or they must have had some skills that you don’t have because there’s always a story in the mind that creates the other. It creates that other person has that that you don’t have. But the truth is we’re all living in that state of you create your own results through whatever it is you believe, and that is the changing of the thoughts.
So with that being said, brother, like I love you say generational healing because it’s not just you. What you’re doing is when you change your thoughts, you’re also going back and undoing, kind of like rewinding or untangling, if I can use that word. Untangling what has been tangled up throughout several generations back, all of that being brought. Your grandparents taught your parents, your parents taught you, and you’ve done all that work to untangle all that yourself. It’s amazing, my friend. It’s amazing.
[00:09:12] JC: Yeah, it is amazing, and I’m very grateful for the lessons and the values that my grandparents provided me, and my parents did a great job raising me. Now that I’m an adult, it’s my responsibility and my choice as to whether I accept that conditioning or I think my own thoughts.
[00:09:31] KA: It’s the choice. You got it, brother, and that’s the empowerment. Let me take that. Let me go off that, what you just said there, and that’s kind of like what’s the most valuable or concept or lesson that you’ve learned in the academy? Because that may be like what you just said there, like I’ve taken that, these lessons. What’s the most valuable concept that you’ve learned?
[00:09:52] JC: Break it down to a concept, the most valuable concept I’ve learned would be faith in myself, and that has come from faith in myself to be able to do, achieve, complete, or step into whatever it is I choose I want. That is something that I didn’t have entering the academy. I used the word permission before. Someone had to give you permission to seek out a bigger business deal, or there was three levels of management sign off for me to spend money on marketing or do this or that. But now, through doing the work, the daily self-study, applying what I’ve learned, I don’t need permission from anyone. I know that if I set my mind to something and I choose to do something that is important, that I have faith that I can create that and make it happen.
[00:10:48] KA: Yeah, brother. 100%. Tell us more about the work because you’ve mentioned that a couple times. In the academy, there’s so much available. There’s so much, I want to say, value, but really value is a thought. But there’s so much available to the students. There’s all the different things that I offer in terms of coaching, and I guess I would say there’s the workbooks. There’s the Slack group. There’s the webinars. There’s the group coaching. When you say you did the work, tell me what your journey at the academy has been like. What’s been valuable for you?
[00:11:21] JC: Yeah. What has been available to me was I remember very early on I asked you the question. I said what sets apart guys that get the most out of this program from the guys that don’t, and you said the guys that do the work get the most out of this. So to me, doing the work was the beginning of every month, it’s reading the 20 or 30 pages that you publish on each month’s particular topic, whether it’s money or self-confidence or impossible goals, right? So it’s doing the reading. At the end of the reading, there’s a monthly assignment. It typically involves doing a thought down. Whatever’s on your mind, getting it out, down on paper, and in front of you.
Then from there, you grab one of those thoughts, which is typically something from your programming or your conditioning. You complete a model on that; the circumstance, the thought, feeling, the action, the results. That’s what we call an unintentional model. It’s the programming, running the show there. Then we intentionally choose a feeling that we want to feel, whether it’s empowered, whether it’s confidence or anything like that, corresponding to the same circumstance from the unintentional model. Then you choose the thought that’s going to create that feeling based on your circumstance. You devise a set of actions, and those actions lead to certain results.
That’s the majority of the daily work. I’ve got notebooks full of doing that just about every morning, and I’ve done it on everything from business challenges, business partnerships, life, relationships, girlfriends, money. You name it, it applies. So in doing that, we’re doing that growth, chasing out all that conditioning that’s hiding in the bushes. Addressing it one by one over 15 months now has been incredible, an easy way for me to tie all this together. It’s a story I shared with you. A couple of weeks ago, I went from – When I started with the program, I was looking at deals that netted $15,000 in net profit. Two weeks ago, I found myself submitting formal letters of intent on seven-figure portfolios.
[00:13:36] KA: Yeah, brother. I know it’s amazing and I can’t wait to have you share some of those success stories from over the last 15 months but the impossible goal specifically. But what I’m hearing is – Again, I do want to let everybody in the podcast audience know that you can enroll in the academy with or without one-on-one coaching. There’s a little bit of a price difference. But what Jay is basically telling you guys is that for him the work is what he’s done every single day, consistency every single day. Looking at what are the stories the mind is telling me and then doing those models of alignment to detach from the way those stories are creating as results. That’s the cognitive mastery curriculum. 101 is the awareness, the thought downloads. What is the stories? 102 is detachment, which is looking at the model of alignment to see do I want this result to perpetuate in my life? If I don’t, we go to the intentional model, choose the feeling, how do I want to feel, what do I want to create, and do that.
That’s amazing. I mean, that’s big to hear that doing the work, brother, daily consistently on your own, just with what’s offered in the academy, has brought you this far. Now, I also don’t want to downplay the one-on-one coaching because you and I have worked together quite a bit over the course of the year. But to hear you say that the work comes from that consistency and looking at your mind and asking yourself, choosing for yourself, do I want this thought, do I want this result because they’re really the same thing, thoughts and results. The thoughts create the results is what’s changed your life.
So with that being said, brother, I guess I want to ask, what is the biggest challenge that you’ve overcome over the course of 15 months? Is it the money scarcity? Because you mentioned so many things. You mentioned money. You mentioned relationships. You mentioned many things. What’s the biggest challenge that you’ve overcome over the course of your academy journey?
[00:15:33] JC: It’s interesting. The daily work and the self-study, that has helped me tremendously overcoming the conditioning, going after the goals that I want, realizing things. But the one-on one-coaching was the biggest gains I’ve had in that area, and it kind of ties back into the biggest challenge I’ve overcome is working with you one-on-one has allowed me to step into being the kind of man that I want to be. In doing so without apology, it has helped me tremendously and stepping into just being a strong, ambitious, confident man that I use my power and apply my power to serve others and do it in a firm and kind and generous way.
So that’s where the real value in the one-on-one coaching has been, and the truth is, is it feels so comfortable and so natural too. In the beginning, it’s in overcoming the biggest challenge. The biggest challenge was a guide. I used the term step into that because that’s what it felt like. It wasn’t like I had to completely change who I am or alter my thinking or anything like that. I just – It was always there. I’d always thought and felt that I was capable of doing something more for myself and for the world and for the community and anything like that. It’s just get your help on a weekly basis with that one-on-one coaching to do it.
[00:16:57] KA: Yeah, that’s so wild that you say that, brother, because I love what you say. I’ve always felt that’s what’s so amazing, brothers. Like when you hear Jay say that, I know you guys feel that too. You guys know because there’s nothing that anybody else has for you. You have it within you. So Jay says, “I’ve always felt, I’ve always felt, I’ve always felt,” because it’s there. It’s within you. That’s the move, and maybe it is the coaching, right? Maybe it is the guidance that helps to reveal that so that you can see it and move into more of who you are.
But at the same time, at the same time, you’re also doing that by observing that inner not self, by observing that inner not self through the awareness, through the thought downloads, through the models of alignment. So it’s kind of like a double-edged sword in a good way, not in a bad way where we say a double-edged sword to cut you both ways. But it’s where you have your observation. You have your awareness of who you’re not through just listening to your mind, writing down the thoughts, starting to detach from those results that those stories are creating. Then on the other side, there’s the guidance that says, “This is who you are. Like let me show – Hold up a mirror here, so you can see what is happening. So you recognize more of the truth. So you can see more of who you actually are, instead of listening to those stories of who you’re not.” So I love that, brother. I love that.
Let’s go into the success story. Because you’ve mentioned it a couple times, I definitely want you to tell your story around this. Hit us with the impossible goal. Tell us what happened in 2021. In fact, if you would, start us in December of 2020 because that’s where we really were we begin the impossible goal work and then how you went through the entire year. I mean, here we are now. By the time this podcast airs, it’ll be 2022. So take us through the whole year, brother. Take us through the whole year 2021 in your impossible goal.
[00:18:46] JC: Okay. So December 1st, 2020, I read the 20 or 30 pages on the impossible goal in the workbook and went to work. Brainstormed a couple of them and figured out what was going to work for me that was going to be a big stretch. So it’s supposed to be impossible, right? I’m not supposed to be able to hit this thing and chose something that applied to me in my business in real estate that was in terms of it was a monetary number corresponding to income, both active, passive income, and net worth. I went to work throughout the month, every morning during the thought download around that impossible goal, and it chases out the feelings of doubt and inadequacy, of impossibility. You write those things down, and each day you grab one of those thoughts, and you address it with the unintentional model and then the intentional model.
By the time December 30 or even before December 31st but rolled around, I’m beginning to feel like this was in my grasp. I wasn’t just thinking it. I was believing it in the middle of the month, and then I was feeling it towards the end of the month and went to work. Devise a system to chart my progress on a monthly basis. I started an accountability thread in our community on Slack to keep – It’s not so much about keeping the group up to speed. It’s just about me putting it up there every month and being honest with myself. Just kept plugging away, plugging away throughout the year.
Some months, I was on track. Some months, I was way behind but just kept applying myself and applying the growth. As the year went along, I had momentum. My confidence was growing. I was doing bigger deals and I was having way more fun, outsource more work. I’ve delegated more work. I hired an assistant. I value my time and have stopped doing things that I shouldn’t be doing to free up my time and my energy to think bigger. Now, here we are. I just did the math. As I sit right now, I am seven-tenths of 1% away from achieving the goal.
Kevin, we talked about this last week one-on-one where it doesn’t even matter to me whether I tick the box with the numbers in the math because that doesn’t matter. What matters to me is it’s who I’ve become along the way, the growth, the way I see myself, value my time, view myself. I’ve gone from a scarcity mentality around money to thinking so abundantly that I’ve actually started working together with a gentleman who was a competitor in my space. Now, we’re working together, working on high six and seven-figure deals.
[00:21:43] KA: It’s so wild. I mean, so much of that you said in there. Now, I’m going to ask you some very specific questions. But, first, just so you brothers can know. I mean, listening to Jay’s story is so amazing. Because in the beginning, what he’s telling you guys is the first month in December of 2020, in that first month just by doing the work, just by looking at the mind, looking at what are the stories my brain is telling me, the doubts and inadequacies, by going through that daily work, he’s now creating new stories. Those new stories are driving new feelings to where by the end of December, even though the goal is still an impossible goal, it started to feel more possible. That’s the move. It’s what are you capable of.
Now, to prove that, to make that belief happen, like so it’s not just a story and a feeling, it’s something you’re creating and cultivating within you, making it a belief is all the actions that he took over 2021, and he’s right. This is the point, brothers. Because Jay will tell you, he just did tell you, he’s like, “I’m close to the goal.” Because we are in December. When you guys hear this, it’ll be January. But we are in December here. He says, “I’m close. I’m not there yet.” It doesn’t matter if you have $999,999 in the bank, but your goal was a million dollars. What he’s telling you guys is that he’s living his dream. He’s living a new life. He’s living – He’s no more money scarcity, recognizes the power of abundance, which means that next year he can double, triple what he did this year.
With that, not only is he going to be making more money, but he’s doing it with less time. He’s spending less time on his business. He’s outsourcing. He’s hiring people. He’s doing it, the work, where it’s not in this grind. There’s not this grind. There’s not this, “Oh, I have to work 20 hours a day to create this wealth or to achieve this impossible goal.” The more he realizes who he is, the more he realizes that money is everywhere. Money is everywhere. Women are everywhere. Everything is everywhere because everything is one. We’re all living in a field of abundance. So what I love is he’s telling you guys. It’s like, look, it’s not about time. It’s about belief. It’s not about the work. It’s not about working, right? It’s not about busyness. It’s not about 20 hours. It’s about do you have the belief. Do you have the story to create the result?
I love it, brother. I mean, I love it. So tell us if you don’t mind. I know that because the impossible goal did have to do with money, so I know that this may be a little bit of a personal question. But if you wouldn’t mind sharing, what was your impossible goal?
[00:24:22] JC: So the impossible goal for 2021 was to create $500,000 in income, new promissory note equity, and net worth additions. So that means active income. You flip a house. You sell it for 50 grand, more than you bought it for, right? So that ties into it. I do sell some houses with seller financing, where my company serves as the bank. You’ve got 50 grand into a house and you sell it for 125. That’s $75,000 [inaudible 00:24:54] you got there. Then the net worth stuff typically into purchasing rental properties where you buy them at a discount that goes to your balance sheet.
[00:25:07] KA: Yeah. I love it, brother. Now, another question. It may be personal but you’re being very open and I love that. I love how open and vulnerable you’re being, Jay. Honestly, brother, it’s amazing because you’re sharing this with an audience that is really getting a lot of value from your story. In 2020, starting 2020, why was half a million impossible? Where were you at then?
[00:25:28] JC: I spent 10 years as a mechanical engineer. I think my best salary was a little north of $100,000 for a year, and there was just this mental – It was supposed to be a milestone for me to earn enough money with my own business that I surpassed my last engineering salary. But rather than it being a milestone, it was almost like a ceiling for me, where in the years preceding that, I would get to 60 or 70, either full time or as a side hustle. Then you’d take your foot off the gas. Doing the work, the impossible goal work, for whatever reason, it completely eliminated that number from my life. I don’t even think about it this year. I crossed that before the end of the first quarter, gave it a little bit of attention for a few minutes, and gone, just gone from there. I don’t even think about that anymore.
[00:26:28] KA: Yeah, I love it. I mean, brothers, did you hear Jay say foot off the gas? I mean, here’s the thing. He said ceiling, right? Like that’s the move. Why is it a ceiling? It’s a ceiling because your results have to match your beliefs. Your results are being created by your beliefs. So what Jay is basically telling you, brothers, is that he has a story around making just north of 100k, right? That’s his story. That’s what I make. That’s who I am. That’s what my value is in the world. That’s what my monetary worth is. I’ve got $100,000 and I’m making maybe 120,000, 130,000 a year. That is the story I tell myself. The person I am makes this amount of money.
When he says you get to that point, and then you take your foot off the gas, what’s happening is a confirmation bias that reinforces that belief. That’s what it is. That’s the universal truth. That’s the model of alignment. So his story of I took my foot off the gas is really just explaining to all of you out there that he would just make sure that his results always matched his thoughts. He would get to a point where his results were there, and that was it. It’s good. We’re done. We made it. We match our belief. We don’t have to go any further. We have this ceiling.
Doing the Impossible goal, he blasted the ceiling. He took away the ceiling. He went through the ceiling because he got rid of those stories and he replaced those stories with new stories, new stories that 500,000, that half a million was not only possible, but it’s who he is. It’s the story that he writes about, what he does, and what he creates in terms of wealth. I love it, brother. I love you say foot off the gas because that is confirmation bias, right? Like that’s what’s so wild. That’s what it is. It’s all just story.
You know what? Jay is unique. Okay, brothers. Jay is unique. Jay is special. But you guys all have this power. When I say Jay is unique and Jay is special, basically what I’m saying is you guys are all unique and you’re all special. You all have this power to do this. This is the power that we are given. This is the power that – I would even call it a gift, right? It’s a gift of the source. It’s a gift of being humans. Look, other animals don’t have this power, brothers. They don’t. Human beings have this power. You have this power. It’s a gift. You are creating your world. You’re a co-creator and when you realize that, as Jay did and as he was saying.
I’m looking forward to 2022, brother. Me quite honestly, I want to know what you got in store this year. Because, I mean, now that you know you have this, it’s like there is no ceiling, right?
[00:28:58] JC: No, there isn’t actually. I mean, if anything, it’s I’ve got this stop loss in place where it’s under my feet, and this 500k is under my feet now. It’s just blue sky overhead. At minimum, I’ve got the knowledge and skills and network and everything to just do this all over again. But the truth is I didn’t get into this to settle and do the same thing over and over again. I’m here to conquer new shit every day, every month, every year.
[00:29:24] KA: Yeah. You guys can hear that too, right? You can hear it in. You can hear it in his voice. It’s like he says it’s a stop loss. It’s a floor now. Why is it a floor? Because it’s the new belief. That new result will always reinforce that new belief. The new belief is 500,000 a year. The old belief was 130 a year. That was why the foot came off the gas when that was hit in the result line. The new belief is 500k a year so that will be the new result no matter what. But as Jay is saying, he is not going to stop here. There’s no more limit. The sky is the limit. There’s no – Even the sky is not the limit, right? Like it’s just blast off into intergalactic spaceship into some other dimension where you can do anything you want.
I love it, brother. I love hearing your story and everything. So what would you tell others? Let’s put it – Let me ask you that. What would you tell others about enrolling in the academy and why? What would you tell them and why would you tell them that?
[00:30:26] JC: First, you’ve got to be honest with yourself. Are you looking to spend money and take a pill and have everything fixed? Or are you the person that’s going to embrace the opportunity, do the work, take advantage of their time with you if they choose the one-on-one coaching, and implement this stuff? If the answer is yes to that, then enroll. If self-actualization, doing more for yourself, being more for your family and those around you, unlocking everything that you have inside sounds good, then this is a great way to do so.
[00:31:01] KA: Yeah. I love it, brother. Self-actualization, that is the move, right?
[00:31:05] JC: It really is. Everything else is material, constantly seeking a better version of you and doing more and serving more, making an act big or small. When you take all that material stuff off the table and you do it for the sake of doing it, it feels incredible.
[00:31:25] KA: Yeah, for the sake of doing it, for the sake of knowing that you can, right? It’s like – That is the big move. The other thing that Jay is talking about, brothers, is he’s talking about others, right? He’s saying others, yeah, because a part of self-actualization is knowing that we are all one. That when we grow, when we evolve, when we develop, when we recognize the truth of who we are, we become a part of the oneness of everything else. That really creates that big love feeling, that big unconditional love feeling for all humans.
Now, of course, there’s the compassion for those who are still asleep, for those who are sort of living the nightmare of their dream. But all of it is you’re doing this for you. But when you recognize that you are all, that’s the big move. It’s almost like this and if I could use an analogy. I don’t want to hijack Jay’s time because I have a couple more questions for him. But it’s kind of like this. It’s like we’re all dreaming. We’re all dreaming this dream. The difference between those who are in their alpha state and their beta condition is like the difference between those who are dreaming a dream as a character in their dream is the beta condition, right? Like you’re this character, and you feel a part of this story.
Whereas in your alpha state, you’re lucid dreaming. Like you’re this character in your story of the dream, but you’re also controlling the entire dream. Everything about it is within your control, and that’s the difference, either being the character or being the writer of the entire story. That’s the self-actualization that you are all capable of when you wake up from that illusion that’s being run in your head like, “What is the story? What is the story? What is the story creating the result?” Because I guarantee you, brothers, it is not the circumstance creating the result. It is always the thoughts.
So if someone is seeking self-knowledge, brother, if they are seeking self-actualization, if they are ready to – If they’re not into the get rich quick, right? If they’re not into the get laid tonight, if they’re not into the magic pill thing and they are knowing, “Okay, this is on me. I’m ready to discover who I am.” But they’re a little bit uncertain. They have a little bit of uncertainty about enrolling in the academy, with or without coaching. At this point, I think you’ve made it very clear that with or without coaching is really up to the student. What would you say to that individual who wants this and knows that? They’re on board with you, brother. They’re like, “Okay. Yeah, I’m listening to Jay. He’s like it’s not a quick path. This is a journey for me. I’m still uncertain.” What would you say to them?
[00:33:58] JC: They’re more than welcome to reach out to me directly. I’d be more than happy to share some insights, but you still offer free coaching calls to see if these guys are interested in enrolling in the academy.
[00:34:14] KA: Actually, I don’t anymore, brother.
[00:34:15] JC: Oh, you don’t? Okay.
[00:34:17] KA: It’s okay. It’s alright. It’s okay. Yeah. Now, what Jay is talking about is the consultation calls. In 2020, when Jay came through, they were free consultation calls. However, those calls are only $99. They’re 100 bucks. You guys can definitely schedule one of those. So basically, what he’s saying is that if you’re uncertain, just reach out. Reach out to him. Reach out to me and just determine if it’s right for you. By the way, brother, I do want to ask you how we can get a hold of you. But before that, before asking that because you being in real estate, I know there’s probably even some guys in the audience who would love to maybe work with you. If they’re in the real estate business or if they’re maybe thinking about selling a home, buying a home, doing what you’re doing, or working with you, I will have a question, and that is what is one question you’d wish that I asked and then how would you answer that?
[00:35:10] JC: Well, I was hoping you’re going to ask me what my favorite movie was and why.
[00:35:15] KA: Oh, yes, the movie. Well, let me ask you that first then. What is your favorite movie, brother?
[00:35:19] JC: It’s the 1986 BMX classic called Rad.
[00:35:24] KA: Oh, that’s right. I knew you were BMX. Yeah. Tell me why. Why is that?
[00:35:28] JC: I mean, the hero is the small town guy that qualifies for the biggest BMX race of the year. He steals Lori Loughlin from the villain then wins the biggest BMX race. You guys need to jump on YouTube and check out the intro and the outro to that movie because the video is awesome, and the soundtrack is even better.
[00:35:53] KA: Love it, brother. That’s something I need to check out because I have not seen that movie. 1986. What’s the title?
[00:35:59] JC: Rad.
[00:36:00] KA: Rad, R-A-D.
[00:36:01] JC: R-A-D. It was a 4K remaster last year as well.
[00:36:06] KA: Awesome. Awesome, brother. So you got me. You got me because I missed the movie question. So what’s another question you wish I’d asked but didn’t, and how would you answer?
[00:36:16] JC: Did you ask what is the biggest challenge I’ve had to overcome in my life? I think you asked about the last year.
[00:36:22] KA: Yeah. Tell us about that, brother. Yeah, tell us about that.
[00:36:25] JC: Having the time and space to reflect on it. I spent the better part of the last 10 years fighting against the current of everything that you’re told and you’re taught and conditioned. You’re told who to be starting when you’re three, four, and five years old. Just baffling that for so long, just being this version of myself that wasn’t who I am. There’s a period where I was a pretty angry person. It felt like I was doing everything right. Just you get to the end of the day and you don’t even recognize the life that you have.
I hit a pretty low point in 2017 and 2018 and finally made the decision that enough was enough. I was going to address every one of those issues in my life one by one until I came out on the other side. It’s what led me down the path to finding you, finding the podcast, finding the group, and doing the work, and landing me right here.
[00:37:22] KA: That’s an amazing answer to a pretty big question. So the question what is the biggest challenge you’ve overcome in your life, conditioning the not self, right? Everything that everybody’s told you is not you that you just attach to and believe in. That’s really the human condition, brother. Like what you have stated there is the human condition and having overcome the human condition. That’s powerful. That’s powerful.
Now, brothers, I’m going to add, again, as you’ve heard Jay mentioned, he started this journey where he said enough is enough in 2018. So the academy was not his first step, but it’s a part of his journey. It’s a part of a journey that will never end. Self-discovery never ends. It’s just how deep down the rabbit hole do you want to go and how much do you want to discover about your true nature. The more you discover who you are, the more you release yourself from the prison of conditioning, the prison of other people’s opinions, the prison of other people trying to control you, the prison of other people having their judgments about you, and the flip side, the prison of you judging others, the prison of you trying to control others, the prison of you having thoughts about other people because it all comes down to one thing. We are one, in oneness. In that oneness, love emerges. That’s what we are. We’re love. Love is the law, brothers, and the law is love.
Jay, I want to throw it back to you, brother, to kind of control. Not to control but to kind of end the call here. How do people get ahold of you? You’ve offered that. You offer that very generously, very benevolently. How do people get ahold of you for whatever reason, whether it’s to talk about the academy or it’s to talk about real estate or just to get a hold of you, just to get in touch with who you are?
[00:39:06] JC: I’m more than happy to help out. I’d rather just have folks reach out to me directly via email. That’s the way I’m going to see it, the easiest way for me to respond, and the best way for us to do.
[00:39:16] KA: Okay, perfect. We’re going to put Jay’s email in the show notes, so you guys can have access. You guys will have access to the show notes on the website and I believe on iTunes as well. If you’re listening on Spotify, you’re going to need to go to the website to get those show notes. Brother, if you got anything else for me, for us, for the audience, anything.
[00:39:35] JC: Just a big thank you directly to you for the help. Like you said at the beginning, I don’t think it’s just a mentor-client relationship. But we are friends. We have a lot of cool stuff that we do separately that we can kind of come back and discuss. So working with you the last 15 months has been a major game changer for me. Very grateful for the work that you do for the whole crew. I’m looking forward to next year.
[00:40:01] KA: Yeah. Well, yeah. It makes you and me both, brother. I appreciate your sentiments because I look forward to 2022 as well. It’s been an honor to be with you on your journey and see you emerge the light within you, brother. I mean, it is so amazing and I’m truly honored. Brothers, that is Jay Chekansky. I’m Kevin Aillaud. Until next week, elevate your alpha.
[END OF EPISODE]
[00:40:26] ANNOUNCER: Thank you for listening to this episode of The Alpha Male Coach Podcast. If you have enjoyed what you’ve heard and want even more, sign up for Unleash Your Alpha, your guide to shifting to the alpha mindset at thealphamalecoach.com/unleash.
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